There’s so much on this that I couldn’t contain myself to just one post. This is Part 2
I Began Part 1 with, The Bible is a big book, and family is a central theme that runs through it. I can’t hope to look through the whole Bible for what it says about authority in the home, so I am only looking at the three main passages in the New Testament: Ephesians 5:22-6:4, Colossians 3:18-21, and 1 Peter 3:1-7.1 Part 1 was Ephesians. Now on to Colossians and 1 Peter.
As you can see
this is an abbreviated version of Ephesians 5, with two additions:
(1) As it is
fit in the Lord – as is proper, right. Wives have rights and privileges,
but recognition of the husband's leadership is essential to a well-ordered home.2
(2) husbands…be
not bitter against them – Very timely. Bitter, irritated, exasperated,
angry; sadly, men obviously have a tendency toward this. Paul says, “Stop it!
Now!”3
Peter’s exhortation to wives is pretty much the same as Paul’s, but with additions. First thing I notice here is while Paul gives more space to the husbands, Peter gives much more to the wives.
if any obey not the word – Seems to me that these were women who were married to unbelievers. I believe these women came to Christ after they were married. I think it is accurate to say that women often come to Christ before men. And the husbands of these women often treat them abysmally. Many years ago I heard of an area in the Philippines where many women had come to Christ, but few men. Many of these husbands threatened their wives, “If you go to church, I will beat you when you get home.” The women went to church anyway. It was a 3 hour walk one way, every time they got home their husbands beat them. I heard many similar stories.
What does Peter, writing by the Holy Spirit say to wives, even in such circumstances? He doesn’t say, Leave them. He says, Submit to them. That they may be won without a word, by an emphasis on the inner man of the heart: a pure life, with a meek and quiet spirit. Such a life is in the sight of God of great price, and I believe also of great power.
after this manner in the old time the holy women submitted to their husbands. This was not a new command, it is the original ordinance of God.
7 Likewise, ye husbands – in the same way, husbands, even if your wives do not obey the word, do what God calls you to do. Peter says three things to the husbands
Dwell with them according to knowledge – knowledge of the grace of God in her, learning and respecting her strengths, weaknesses, and character; you know how to push her buttons, learn how to love her.
Giving honor unto the wife – listen, she can know the Lord; be filled with the Spirit; have spiritual gifts; speak wisdom; hear from the Lord. Honor her. Respect her thoughts, her ideas, her advice.
As being heirs together – you may be the head of the home, but there is an equality of grace. The home should be her safe place, where she is loved, protected, nurtured. That’s how we provide for our wives.
That your prayers be not hindered – God has her back: disrespect your wife, God will disrespect you.
Finally, children and parents.
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I have briefly presented the Kingdom Principle of Authority. I am fully aware that even though I made seven posts on this, I have really only scratched the surface and that there are some important truths relating to authority that I didn’t even mention, such as the authority of the believer.4
Everyone is responsible to the Lord for the way they live, the choices they make, but when a person is in a position of authority, they are charged with the welfare, protection, and provision of the people they have authority over. A father for example, not only has the power to make decisions for the child, but is responsible before the Lord for the spiritual life in the home, for bringing them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, as well as providing for and protecting them. And will give an account to the Lord for how well he carried out that authority. This is true for every area I mentioned in this series.
What do we do with this? How do we live it out? May the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, grant us mercy and grace to walk in His ways. Amen.5
FINIS
1 I wrestled with this last post for quite a
while before finishing this series. What I’m presenting here is what I am fully
persuaded the Bible teaches. Being human, what is in The Book may not be
perfectly reflected in my life and home. I may need more grace in my heart and
life.
2 A.T. Robertson, Word Pictures In The New Testament; Colossians
3 I suspect women have the same temptation. There is a saying among men, “Women, can’t live with them, can’t live without them.” I’ve also heard the women’s version, “Men, can’t live with them, can’t shoot them.”
4 The best place to start is the book, The Authority of the Believer by John MacMillan.
“John MacMillan was a Canadian Presbyterian lay elder and
businessman who in mid-life became a missionary to China and the Philippines
with The Christian and Missionary Alliance in the 1920s.” Paul King
You can buy the print book at Amazon or read it online / download a pdf version here.
5 I also addressed this in a 3 part series in 2016. The first two are very similar to this series, the last one is, as the title says, the crowning touch.
That evil word submit Part 1
That evil word submit Part 2
The crowning touch (The one I recommend)





