No rules. Yeah, right

Outback has been offering this slogan for years. It sounds so good and echoes the heart of the culture today. “No rules, man, no rules.”

We recently went to a “brew and burger” restaurant and I noticed their coaster:

Doesn’t that sound so rebellious? And rebellious is so popular these days, so fashionable - the really cool people don’t follow no stinkin’ rules.

And yet it’s all such a lie, a mere façade. In fact, one of the strongest rules is to appear to have no rules.

Consider Outback. They have plenty of rules for their cooks and servers, including some kind of dress code. And what about the “brews and burgers” joint? When it comes to brewing beer, you can’t just use any amount of any ingredients and hope to get a good product. There are rules.

No rules, just right? if your going too get it rite, you haf to foller sum rools. And some are much more important than grammar and spelling! Why, I remember one year, many years ago, I had this majestic flower garden along my front sidewalk. My prize was the Mexican sunflowers, which must have been 5 to 6 ft tall. I decided to save some money on water, so when I took a shower I didn’t let the water drain out, I kept it in the tub. When I finished my shower, I carried that water out in buckets and watered my garden. Everything died rather quickly. You see, I didn’t know the rule – gray water is not good for plants.

I like peanut butter cookies. The recipe calls for one cup of peanut butter. My philosophy is damn the rules, so instead of one cup of peanut butter I use one cup of unshelled peanuts. Or shelled peanuts. It won’t matter, whatever it is, I won't get peanut butter cookies.

You are in a boat in the middle of a lake.  You don't know how to swim but your philosophy is damn the rules, so you jump off the boat into the water. Hey, here's a rule, “If you can't swim you're gonna drown.”

Damn the rules, right? Who needs to stop at this red light? let’s just plow through.

I like baking cakes, too. There are instructions on the box, y’know, rules, for baking this cake. Yeah, well, I don’t follow no stinkin’ rules, so instead of baking it for 28 minutes at 350º, I bake it at 450º for 10 minutes. Will it come out “just right”? (Hint: No.)

My mother taught me these simple steps for washing dishes: (1) organize everything, (2) glasses, (3) silverware, (4) plates & bowls, (5) pots & pans. In my opinion, this is the right way to wash dishes, but I guess it doesn’t really matter. (OK, so not everything is a matter of life and death!)

I could go on an on, but this attitude of rules be damned really refers to morality. What they are saying is, “I can do whatever I want, with whoever I want, whenever I want, and you can’t make no rules to stop me.” In fact, our society is so committed to this idea that they make rules enforcing it. Isn’t that a-not-funny-joke?

“Rules be damned, I can do what I want. And we hereby make a rule declaring it is illegal for you to say what I do is wrong.”
“I thought you said there were no rules.”
“New rule: Shut up!”

God has rules. They're not called rules, they're called commandments, but this is exactly what we hate and are angry about. God is the Creator and He knows best what is good for us, yet people look at God’s rules as shackles, and they want to throw off these 'restrictions.'

Wherefore did the heathen rage, and the nations imagine vain things? The kings of the earth stood up, and the rulers gathered themselves together, against the Lord, and against his Christ; saying, Let us break through their bonds, and cast away their yoke from us. (Psalm 2:1-3)

So, Seek ye the LORD while he may be found, call ye upon him while he is near: let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts: and let him return unto the LORD, and he will have mercy upon him; and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon. (Isaiah 55:6-7)